The CFO: Chief Fur Officer

Description: You request to meet with me in my office but make it quick because i have a nail appointment to go to (which is clearly more important than this). you proceed to question me about the monthly financial report i sent over to you. the numbers are off and you’re confused about certain unknown, questionable “expenses” and accuse me of stealing. how dare you! i am the chief financial officer of this company for a reason. all those questionable “expenses” have been spent on more important things; me. my beauty maintenance, office attire, and a large percentage being spent towards my furs! it’s getting cold out and porsha has to stay warm, right? but don’t you love seeing me around the office wearing my expensive fur coat? admiring its luxurious beauty? especially right now, being up close and personal while i tease you with its rich, brown color? allowing you to feel its soft, silky, fuzzy texture? you know you do so you can agree that this is money well spent. further proving why i have the position as the cfo in the first place. so i’ll continue doing my job and spending the company’s money on the important things… porsha and her furs!