Farting At Boyfriend's Family Xmas Party!

Description: I go to your family's xmas party. i'm having such a good time, and i'm looking forward to trying your mom's famous baklava. once at the table, and trying it out, i realize it has pistachios in it! i have a nut allergy, but not the normal kind of nut allergy. i start to fart at the dinner table in front of everyone. i try my best to hold them in, but eventually excuse myself with you in tow. i start to freak out how frequent and loud the farts are getting and tell you to distract your family so they won't notice my absence. i fart over and over until i'm doubled over. the smell starts to get overbearing. i have a wild idea to fart directly into the christmas tree in an attempt to cover the smell. you eventually come back, and i order a ride home. you assure me that i didn't ruin anything, or find me disgusting. turns out your mom finds me to be a really nice girl. i suppose i really am a nice, but gassy, girl!